Handling Criticism As a Christian

Nobody likes being criticized. It's one of those things we all try to avoid, I mean the disapproval of people is never easy to hear, but it's also an inevitable part of life. It's actually a fact that we will all be criticized at some point in our lives.

Like this content on FacebookSometimes the criticism would be unfair and uncalled for, while at other times it would be needed. Either way, it's important to handle it well, because as Christians we represent Christ in all we do. So what's the best way to handle criticism as a Christian? How do we respond well to the criticism we receive instead of blindly reacting to it? Well, we first need to see what the Bible has to say about it.

What is Criticism?

According to dictionary, criticism is the act of finding fault. Criticism has also been defined as a a devastating all-out assault on a person's personality, childhood, past, or character. Complaints, on the other hand, are concerning a person's behavior in relation to a certain thing, time, and location. There is no attack with complaints, but there is emotion and a direct emphasis on the genuine problem.Something that I recently realized is that even if you are staying the truth in a negative way, it can be considered criticizing someone or thing.

Criticism is also the first horsemen of the apocalypse in terms of relationships. This means that relationships that have a lot of criticism are not healthy and more likely to end. Because criticism is so damaging, it is important is to learn the difference between expressing a complaint (or constructive criticism) and criticizing:

• Criticism - You're always late coming home from work which caused dinner to be late. I think it really disrespectful to me and the kids.

• Constructive criticism - I feel it is important for us to eat dinner as a family. When you are late coming home from work that causes everyone to wait for dinner. Can you let me know when you are going to be late so we can decide if we should wait or have dinner without you.

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Bible Verses About Criticism

As a Christian, you may be wondering what does God's Word say about criticism? The Bible has a lot to say about receiving criticism and criticizing others. Take some time to meditate on the following bible verses concerning criticism:

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What The Bible Says About Receiving Criticism:

The Bible contains various passages that provide guidance on how to accept criticism and respond to it. Here are some key principles from the Bible:

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. - James 1:19-20

The ear that listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise. Proverbs 15:31

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. - Proverbs 27:17

Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. - Proverbs 27:5-6

Poverty and disgrace come to him who ignores instruction, but whoever heeds reproof is honored. Proverbs 13:18

Whoever ignores instruction despises himself, but he who listens to reproof gains intelligence. - Proverbs 15:32

Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel. - Proverbs 27:9

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. - Ephesians 4:31-32

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice. - Proverbs 12:15

For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. - Romans 12:3

He who is often reproved, yet stiffens his neck, will suddenly be broken beyond healing. - Proverbs 29:1

A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger. - Proverbs 15:1

What The Bible Says About Criticizing Others:

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Galatians 6:1

All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, - 2 Timothy 3:16

“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure, you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye. Matthew 7:1-5

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. - Ephesians 4:29

Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning. - Proverbs 9:8-9

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. - Matthew 18:15

Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, - Luke 17:3

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. - 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Examples Of Criticism In The Bible

Many people face criticism in the Bible. The two most notable cases of people being criticized in the Bible includes Jesus Christ and Peter.

Jesus Christ

Yes, you read that right, even Jesus, the Son of God was criticized. The Pharisees never missed a chance to criticize who Jesus was or the work He was doing, but He never responded in hate.  Jesus always responded in love knowing that God will take care of things.

To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. “He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth.” When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. 1 Peter 2:21-23 NIV

Peter

As someone who walked with Jesus, Peter knew that he was to obey God even when it didn't make sense to him. Jesus was once criticized for eating with sinners, yet He did not stop. So when Peter saw a vision, he obeyed, even though it was something he knew his Jewish brothers may not understand.

Sure enough, they didn't understand. They did criticize him for what he did, but instead of getting angry for the unjust criticism, he chose to respond calmly and with love.

The apostles and the believers throughout Judea heard that the Gentiles also had received the word of God. So when Peter went up to Jerusalem, the circumcised believers criticized him and said, “You went into the house of uncircumcised men and ate with them.” Starting from the beginning, Peter told them the whole story. Acts 11:1-4 NIV

How Do You Handle Criticism As A Christian?

Dealing with criticism takes a lot of effort, grace and patience. If you let it, the evil one will use both criticism and constructive criticism to keep you from doing the will of God. Satan wants all criticism to tear you down, distort your self-esteem, and cause you to react in a way that does not honor God. As a result, it is critical that you process and respond correctly whenever criticism is leveled at you.

Listen

We're human and as humans being criticized will cause our emotions to rise, and our brains to go into defense mode. Feeling that way would make it difficult for anyone to listen, but this is one of the most important steps to responding well.

Try not to write off what the other person is saying without truly listening. They may be completely wrong, but they might also be right and you wouldn't know unless you listen.

Criticism is sometimes a God-given instrument of correction, so if they're right, admit it. Then use it as an opportunity to change. If they're wrong and you feel calm, lovingly explain how they're wrong.  If you feel too angry to respond with love, ask for some time to process what they've said and walk away. Then move on to the next step.

Consider the Source

Is it constructive criticism from someone who cares about you, or an attack from someone who wants to harm you? Even from loved ones, correction can be difficult to accept; however, if we understand that it is intended to improve us, much of the sting is erased. "Faithful are the wounds of a friend," Solomon wrote (Proverbs 27:6).

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Pray

Prayer is the one thing that can change everything. Whether the criticism you received is burdening you, making you angry, or just has you confused, talk to God. Ask for wisdom. 

When you're unable to handle the criticism on your own, the Lord will help you. You only need to go to Him in prayer and ask.

Ask

Talk to your loved ones. The people who love you will always be honest with you. So if the criticism you received is troubling you and you aren't sure if it's fair, ask someone. 

If your critic is right, your loved ones would have seen it too, and if they're wrong, your loved ones will reassure you.

Reflect

If you didn't give your critic an immediate response, reflect on what you've learned in your prayer time and through your loved ones, then respond with love.

Also remind yourself of who you are in Christ, while you reflect on the whole situation. Remember that your value does not diminish with the disapproval of others. Your identity is secure in Christ and the criticism of others will not be able to change that. 

Make improvements when needed, but never allow the opinions of others to change who God created you to be.

Final Thoughts on How to Handle Criticism

As you begin your journey in better handling criticism, remember that you are a child of God, and as a child of God, you should do all things in love. Give constructive criticism with love and also respond to criticism with love. It won't always be easy but it will always be worth it, and the Holy Spirit will always be there to help you.

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About the Author: 

Corine Williams, Ph.D. is Clinical Psychologist that is currently seeing clients in the States of Maryland, New Jersey, and New York. You can find out more about her practice by visiting www.therapyforchristians.com/corinewilliams.  In addition to providing individual therapy, Dr. Williams is also passionate about writing books and designing merchandise that educate, uplift, and normalize mental health subject in the Christian community. You can find out more about her at  www.booksbycorine.com or by visiting her amazon profile here: https://www.amazon.com/Corine-Hyman/e/B00AWZ5FL2

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Disclaimer: the information, including but not limited to, text, graphics, images and other material contained on this article are for informational purposes only. No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. If you are looking for a Christian counselor near you, please check out our directory located here:  Christians Therapist Near Me